The Toltec fifth agreement says we can choose what
we want to believe. If we do that, we won’t need to tell
others they are wrong because we will understand that
we aren’t responsible for what they create—only for
what we create. If we believe there is only one power,
we must claim it all the time, not just when things are
going well. We are fully responsible for creating both
our joy and our suffering.
SECOND PRINCIPLE/THIRD AGREEMENT
The second Unity principle (We are spiritual beings,
created in God’s image. The spirit of God lives within
each person; therefore, all people are inherently good)
goes along with the third agreement: Don’t make
We don’t come into a faith community and say, “I
think I’ll get on a spiritual path.” We are spiritual.
We have always been spiritual. As Religious Science
movement founder Ernest Holmes said, there
is nothing more spiritual than a ham sandwich.
Everything is spiritual, and we are spiritual beings
immersed by spiritual law that is always in effect. We
will never be separate.
Because we are connected to this infinite power, we
get what we bring. If we come from a spirit of giving,
we get that back. If we come from a spirit of taking,
we get that back. If we come from a spirit of doubt or
a space of being overly cautious, we will attract overly
cautious, doubtful people into our lives.
So often we think that we don’t make
assumptions, but in reality we do. When
we believe that those assumptions
are true, we create what Ruiz
calls “emotional poison.”
This poison is
potent when we make assumptions about what God
is or isn’t going to do for us.
For example, a woman once told me she was going
to have eye problems because her mother had eye
problems. I asked her if she had problems now. No,
she told me, she didn’t but she was sure she would.
We all make assumptions about what is or what
is not possible for us. We need to examine those
assumptions or we limit what’s possible.
I’ve been sober for more than 30 years. During
this time, I’ve heard a lot of assumptions from people
struggling with addiction—almost always about how
hard the struggle is. However, there is no struggle
when you are in harmony with the laws of nature
and with the truth of what you believe. Struggle is
an assumption, while freedom is an action. When I
wanted to be free, I let go of struggle. I attended every
one of my Unity church’s events for two years. I came
every Sunday, and I came to everything else they had
because I knew an idea for me existed that could be
greater than any assumption I had ever held in my life.
THIRD PRINCIPLE/SECOND AGREEMENT
This walks us into the third Unity principle (I
create my experiences by what I choose to think and
what I feel and believe) and the second agreement:
Don’t take anything personally.
We create our lives by the way we think, but too
often, we spend time trying to set something right
instead of seeing it right. When we take something
someone else says or does personally, Ruiz says,
“We make the assumption that they know what is
in our world, and we try to impose our world on
Think about it. If someone can upset you to the
point that you’re still stewing over it later, you are the
one who chose to stay in a bad mood. When we take it
personally, it becomes personal only because we made
it so. This is true whether you are downsized from
your job, get evicted from your apartment, or break
up with a partner. The truth is that you can’t
remain in whatever tiny box doesn’t fit
anymore. This is not a time to hold
on to the wrong kind of energy
and turn God off. It’s time
to be filled with the